How To Maintain Your Identity Outside Of Rehab

Many people leaving rehab face an unexpected challenge. They finally see that the people who always “had their lives together” are far from perfect. Suddenly they are the ones who have the real problems.

This is because in rehab, you spend weeks or months working on your identity. You don’t just deal with your cravings. Rather, you learn to relate to the world in a brand new way. You learn how to appreciate everything in your life, how to face adversity, and how to better manage your relationships. It’s like you have a whole new identity.

Then, when you go back into the world, everyone else relates to you as the person you used to be. They also relate to the world in unhealthy ways, similar to how you did before.

This is a common experience, and occurs in any number of circumstances. It can be particularly poignant for male addicts. Recovering males often return to friend groups in which speaking about feelings and being vulnerable is seen as shameful.

After spending so much time in a safe space where you could explore your true identity, it becomes difficult to actually maintain that identity. You find yourself holding things back, laughing at jokes which are toxic, and relating to people just like you did before rehab.

The worst part is that it’s not just others who act in these ways. When back in these familiar settings, it is all too easy to revert to the person you used to be without really being aware of it.

It’s not a simple matter, but there are ways to maintain your identity outside of rehab. These tips will give you a starting point.

Avoid spending time in groups

When you leave rehab, your friends might be eager to go out with you. They may even plan some alcohol and substance-free activities. Diving right back in is going to be tempting.

However, try and resist the urge to do so. If you can, avoid going straight back into group settings. It is very difficult to maintain your new identity in your old friend groups. You’re going to want to keep everyone happy rather than relate in a real way. Groups rarely provide the space to be vulnerable and open up. They are more likely to close all avenues to do so.

Ideally, meet up with your friends in a one-on-one setting. This way, you can take the exciting risk of opening up about what you’ve gone through. Eventually, when you do start spending time in groups again, your friends will have had a chance to get to know the identity you’ve discovered.

Aim for “good enough”

In rehab, you learn a lot about how to relate to the world and others in a more authentic way. It is exciting and you have never felt more in tune. When you leave rehab, you will want to use the communication techniques you have learned to interact with others.

Unfortunately, it will not often go as smoothly as you imagined. You will find yourself skipping steps and, in some cases, giving answers that are less than honest.

The thing is that real world interactions don’t go as smoothly as when presented on a worksheet or in rehab. Rehab is a kind of vacuum. The outside world is always throwing complications at you, and you simply cannot and should not plan all your interactions.

Rather than trying for perfection, aim for good enough. Did you manage to express yourself better than you would have before rehab? That’s a great start. If not, you can try a less ambitious approach the next time.

Spend time alone

Humans are social beings. These days, it is tempting to always be speaking to someone, whether in person or over phone or text. But socializing can also be a way of avoiding scary thoughts and feelings. It can end up suppressing your identity.

In order to maintain what you have learned in rehab, you are going to have to regularly spend time alone. Spend this time meditating, doing some exercises, or simply being creative. The details are up to you, but make sure you’re not just turning off your mind.

Maintaining your identity outside of rehab is going to be one of the biggest challenges you face. Spend the necessary time working on yourself, even if it means you can’t be as social as you were before rehab.

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source https://www.serenitymaliburehab.com/how-to-maintain-your-identity-outside-of-rehab/

Tips For Managing Cravings When Working From Home

One of the biggest changes to life in 2020 is that tons of people are suddenly working from home. While remote work has long been the norm for millions of freelancers, it is a brand new experience for those of us used to going to an office. For recovering alcoholics and substance users, it can be particularly challenging.

At the office, it is relatively easy to stay away from drugs and alcohol. Not only will colleagues and supervisors notice if you are drunk or high, but you are generally so distracted by your work that cravings don’t bother you. At home, however, staying focused on work is far more difficult. Cravings therefore become more dangerous.

That said, it is definitely possible to stay away from drugs and alcohol while working from home. Here are some tips to get you used to the challenge.

Create physical boundaries

Physical boundaries are incredibly important for recovering addicts working from home. You may not be fortunate to have enough space for a home office. Nonetheless, you can still segment your space effectively.

Instead of seeing your entire apartment as your home office, designate a particular chair at a particular table or desk. Only work from this space. Then, decide which areas of your apartment should be off-limits during the work day. This should include the space in front of the TV, most of your kitchen and, if possible, your bedroom.

It is important to find a balance. You don’t want to feel claustrophobic, so allow yourself to walk around, go outside, and use the kettle to make coffee. But if you can’t physically differentiate between work and leisure time, it is going to be hard to focus on what you should be doing. Cravings may take this opportunity to sneak in.

Structure your day

Just as physical boundaries are important, so are boundaries in time. An unstructured day is dangerous for recovering addicts. One of the side-effects of addiction is generally that one hour blurs into the next, day blurs into night. This further enables addiction, as any time could consequently be the “right” time for a drink or to pop a pill.

When working from home, structure your time as you would in an office. Schedule in a lunch break. Take coffee breaks, as you would at work. And only work during office hours if possible.

Furthermore, you should eat at meal times and make time to walk or exercise.

Use mindfulness strategies

Mindfulness strategies are regularly used in addiction treatment and rehab centers. Mindfulness is one of the most effective ways of managing cravings. Mindfulness works by helping you to see the moment through, rather than simply trying to get through it. It gives you the tools to acknowledge the craving without reacting. When you simply let the craving be, it goes away over time without causing any damage.

Mindfulness is deceptively simple, and it takes a lot of practice and training to get used to. Ideally, you’ll have learned some mindfulness strategies in rehab. If not, mobile apps like Headspace and Calm do a great job at guiding you through different courses.

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source https://www.serenitymaliburehab.com/tips-for-managing-cravings-when-working-from-home/

Is Online Therapy As Good As Being In A Therapist’s Office?

While the country is starting to open up again after an extended period of stay-at-home orders, not everyone is ready to take the risk. For many people recovering from alcoholism and substance use disorder, the situation is particularly dicey. After all, alcohol and drugs can have a severe impact on your physical health. Many chronic illnesses brought about by addiction can put you at high risk for complications from the coronavirus.

Nonetheless, you need to continue with your treatment to stay mentally healthy and avoid relapses. Many support groups and meetings have continued online to great effect. But what about individual therapy?

Individual therapy is incredibly important for your continued recovery. It is where you can share your struggles, vent, and do impactful work on yourself. Your therapist will probably see you online. But is online therapy really a worthy alternative?

There are a number of reasons people are skeptical about online therapy. The main qualm is that your therapist cannot read your body language without you in the room. However, there are also benefits, and many people have found online therapy to be as helpful, if not more so, than traditional therapy.

Let’s take a look at the various factors which determine the impact of online therapy.

Body language

Any good therapist will tell you that they often get more information from your body language than from what you are actively telling them. They can detect when you are misrepresenting something, even if you do not realize it yourself. They notice how your body reacts to certain statements, what makes you retreat into yourself, and what draws you out.

This is probably the most commonly cited problem with online therapy. Even if the therapist can see you, their view is limited. Furthermore, you can see yourself and, consciously or unconsciously, curate what your physical appearance is communicating.

However, contrary to what most therapists have assumed, body language can play an even bigger part in online therapy than it would in an office. The main reason for this is that therapists will regularly check in with what their clients are experiencing physically. You become more aware of how your own body is reacting and have to relay this to your therapist.

Sure, there are things you will miss or even specifically leave out, but even in person you curate your physical reactions to a certain extent. When your physical responses become an active part of the therapy process, there is a whole level of data to delve into.

Another important factor is that you as the client feel more comfortable with certain physical responses. Responses you would repress or block out in person. This is particularly useful when discussing sexuality. Clients who would avoid allowing themselves to experience physical arousal at all costs in person can let go in the safety of their own homes.

The physical distance can make this feel not only more comfortable but safer as well, for both the client and the therapist. Therefore, issues which you might never raise in person can become a crucial part of your therapeutic journey.

This is not to say that online therapy is necessarily better in terms of the physical than in-office therapy. However, each has its pros and cons, and the lack of in-person body language doesn’t have to make therapy worse.

Other issues with online therapy

Body language is not the only difference between online and traditional therapy. It is the most clear-cut factor, but there are other considerations.

Most pressing is the lack of privacy some people worry about when it comes to having therapy at home. This is especially problematic in relationships where abuse is taking place. You might not feel safe enough to share openly even if you are alone in a room. The possibility of someone else hearing your session can paralyze your ability to be vulnerable.

If this is true for you, it may be best to find a way to see your therapist in person, safely. Make sure that their office is sanitized after every session and that hand sanitizer is available. Wear a mask and be careful not to touch your face. Wash your hands thoroughly after the session.

Another more mundane factor is technical issues. People who struggle with technology can have a tough time getting used to video calls. Also, a poor internet connection can make the session choppy. This can be incredibly disruptive and, for some people, unsettling.

Try to ensure that your internet connection is stable before any sessions, and ask for help if you have trouble with the technological admin.

Online therapy is crucial in the time of COVID-19, especially for recovering addicts with compromised immune systems or chronic conditions. It is a somewhat different experience, but it certainly has its benefits, and can be as good as, if not better than, the alternative.

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source https://www.serenitymaliburehab.com/is-online-therapy-as-good-as-being-in-a-therapists-office/